HARDEST PART OF ADOPTION

This Month would have been the month we would have started our adoption process. Its so hard to grasp that things could have been so different for our Family. I have been so raw and honest with everything that this has got to be the hardest month of all. Knowing it's national Adoption month doesn't help as much as I know it is the most greatest blessing for these children who we know and love very much. Doesn't subside that we have a loss. To see where I was emotionally during this blog I wrote when I found out they could be going. Knowing the boys could be leaving and not fathoming it at all. Typing and crying at the same time because this blog became our reality they are gone. So I thought I would share the blog again. I am human with trying to comfort my heart with God's promises and It's a struggle. At that time I guess I truly  believed  they wouldn't be going and I was so wrong. This is my testament to true Selfless Faith. So yes I struggle my blogging is my outlet and God will see us through.





I have been so honest during our journey to adoption. So much that you guys know the good and the bad. With foster adoption there is no guarantee even though you are called with a case that sounds promising.

 So here it goes, last week on our way to vacation I received an email with the words of "approval" that's right. The family member was approved. The person we were hoping get approved was. I was shocked I truly didn't think it would happen. I thought we had enough reasons that it wouldn't. So let me just tell you being stuck in traffic for 4 hours with this news was not fun at all. I had to truly hold it in so the kids wouldn't wonder what was wrong with me and start to pray.

 I don't want to say it or share it because that just makes it more real for me. But its the the one thing we did not want to have to go through again. My boys could be leaving in 14 days. Gone where I will never see them again to someone they do not even know. If you have kept up with us on our journey you know that this same exact time last year we lost our Little Elijah. Same exact time can you believe that? I can't it is so weird and hard. I truly know the word trial because we are facing it. We have to know that the boys we have so cherished and cared and loved for and taken in as our own could potentially not be here. That is hard to grasp.

So here it is, We are a testament to Jesus Christ!!!! He will see us through it with out him we would not be able to do it.He is going to get us through the hardest or the best times. We know he is a ever loving God and how ever it works out he is there. If we say we are Christians than we have to attest to it. If that means that we love the orphans and they go or if they stay we have to know we did what we were called to do.

   With getting the email and feeling like my world was caving in and stuck in the hottest part of the desert. I hear a sweet voice from the back of the car and  her not knowing what I just had found out. She says" Mommy look what that sign says"TRUST JESUS" It was clear as day right their on a power pole in the middle of no where. A yellow sign with red letters that made me cry even more because I knew in that moment that God was there. He wanted me to see it at that time.

So I would please ask that you keep our family in your prayers.

JULY 13th is going to be a very hard day. This is the day we can be saying goodbye to our boys or continuing our journey to adopting them. If you are a Mother than you know the feeling of you never wanting to loose your children.  Knowing that I will have someone decide that for me is going to be rough.

Last year on July 18th we lost Elijah. It is kind of hard to know that these two dates are so close together. These 2 little boys do not deserve to go through what they are going through and we are going to do all we can to keep them safe. So please keep them in your prayers that they will stay safe in all of this.

July 13th will mark 8 months since they have been with us. We have had the hardest and best times during it also. I am thankful for everyone who has invested in our family and supported us along the way. The boys will not know or our children til that day we feel that is best for them. So all these little people involved lift them up in your prayers as they don't understand what is going on.

         Psalms 55:22
      Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you;
     he will never let the righteous fall.